10 Adjectives 4-6

A couple of days ago I shared three characteristics of my "ideal mate". Here are the next three...

Good listener. The longer I've been married (a whopping 10 1/2 weeks) the more I realize how often I cite this one to Jeff. "You're not listening to me!" "How hard is it to listen to me?" And the one I shouldn't say, but still do, "You NEVER listen to me!" Listening is so important to women. I think it's important to me because it makes me feel important, special, loved. So often I equate being listened to with being taken seriously or seen as worthwhile. I'm not always a very outgoing or outspoken person, and consequently get conversations cut short by someone who has something more interesting or important to say. I slink back into the background, pretending that it didn't bother me and I was done talking anyway. Having a husband who really listens is such a blessing. I don't always think Jeff does a great job at this one, but I also know I need to cut him some slack. I need to be more understanding when he forgets things I tell him. I need to be more patient when I need to tell him things multiple times. I need to remember that he's understanding and patient with me when I forget or ask a question multiple times. At the same time, when I have a rough day at work, when something is bothering me, when I'm frustrated, and even when I'm really excited about something, God has given me a wonderful shoulder to cry on and listening ear in Jeff. Jeff, thanks for being a good listener, and forgive me for the times I accuse you of never listening. It's not true. I'm going to work on this one myself!

Patient. I am blessed with a patient man. It's funny, because I've been told I'm the patient one, but Jeff is just as patient. He's patient with me. I can fly off the handle about something and he'll still tell me he loves me. I can get home later than I intended from work and he doesn't mind (though I try not to let that one happen too often). He's so patient about our apartment seeming to be in a constant state of disorder, and has been equally as patient about me figuring out how to be a little more domestic. He puts up with my rants. He's patient when I'm upset. Which sometimes makes me more upset that he isn't upset, but in retrospect it's better that way. This is also something I want to work on as a wife - being patient with my husband!

Understanding. A close relative of patience, understanding is important in a marriage relationship as well. It's good to be understanding when work schedules shift and plans change. It's good to be understanding when the dishes or laundry didn't get done yet. Jeff is good about understanding what my job entails and I'm working on understanding his. He's great about understanding my need to pick up and go visit my family at times (they live 3 hours away). I try to be understanding of his need for "guy time". We're not always great at understanding each other during conversations, but we're getting there. We're working on understanding those little things about each other that you really don't find out until you're living with the person (like why he always wants to invite people over and why I'd rather not a lot of the time). I'm so thankful for a man who understands that faith is number one and family is close behind. I'm thankful for a man who understands that he's the head of our house and is working each day at living that out. I'm thankful that God gave me a man who truly tries to put Him ahead of me. What a blessing!

Stay tuned for the final four in the next day or so!
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